georgehottieson:

when someone gets a lyric reference you made and then continues with the next line

image


figurants:

some people were born today. hello babies welcome to the earth. you missed a bunch of stuff while you were busy not existing. jbiebs did some things you would not believe

(Source: gooqueen)


kidouyuuto:

last year my chemistry teacher dropped something and yelled “zoo wee mama” and i laughed so hard i passed out and i woke up in the nurses office



unclefather:

gf: Come over

me: i can’t i’m skiing

gf: I have dog treats

me: image


earthdad:

too ugly to get followers from selfies and not funny enough to get followers from posts


nasadad:

ive known you since 5th grade dude just jack me off

(Source: coolandchill98)


What’s the point of waking up if it’s not next to you?
late night thoughts (via twokeight)

(Source: the-psycho-cutie)


partybarackisinthehousetonight:

if you choose a job you love, you’ll never have to work a day in your life!! because the field you’re interested in isn’t hiring


vvhitehouse:

aneastcoastbreeze:

vvhitehouse:

advantages to wearing oversized sweaters:

  • instant cute outfit with minimal effort
  • it enhances the coziness when u drink hot beverages
  • sweater paws are guaranteed to make u feel 43% more adorable
  • u can unbutton ur jeans and no one will know

disadvantages to wearing oversized sweaters:

Guys think they’re totally not cute lol

the day i dress for a man is the day they dress me in my coffin to see jesus


cokeflow:

"what’s your blog about?"

image


communistbakery:

all the other kids with their pumped up kiks


jesuschristvevo:

do dogs think in barks


bewilden:

fileformat:

how are these people not dead

Oh he can eat plastic bags and the other lady can eat drywall, but if I want to enjoy some fucking cookie dough I’ll get salmonella and die

bewilden:

fileformat:

how are these people not dead

Oh he can eat plastic bags and the other lady can eat drywall, but if I want to enjoy some fucking cookie dough I’ll get salmonella and die


saladder:

people who bite ice cream with their front teeth are on a whole different level